Everybody Needs a Little Time Away…

This week…Nonna and I took a slight break from each other in preparation for my departure from her home into “wife world.”

Actually, I was just dog sitting for my cousin…

Nevertheless, Nonna was just as traumatized as the day I left for college.

On Tuesday morning, Nonna made sure I was well taken care of:

She prepared my breakfast, lunch and dinner for the next three days.  She then went over the contact numbers for my Aunt as well as all relevant home addresses for any relative in the tri state area.  She asked approximately ten times whether she could stay with me.  On the eleventh time, I cracked:

Me: Nonna, I need a break!

Non: Break from wha? Work? You want me to bring you lunch on work?

Me: No…from you! I need to sit on a couch and enjoy quiet for two days.

Non: (starts crying) You gonna miss me when I gone.

Me: Oh God…

Non: Wha you going to do when no one help on you anymore…who gonna cookin, cleanin for you?

Me: I will…and Chris will help.

Non: If I no take care of people…what I gonna do?

Me: You need a new hobby.

Non: I come stay with you.

Me: No.

Non: Please…me and you we stay together.

Me: No.

Non: When you move out, I gonna come stay with you.

Me: No.

Non: I gonna surprise you and make sure your house is clean.

Me: You are ridiculous.

Non: You no appreciate me.

Me: I appreciate you very much…I just need a break.

After leaving the house for work, and watching Nonna wave to me from the front porch like I was going off to war…I couldn’t help but crack up…

Night one went well…and I called Nonna at about 5pm the next day.

Me: Hi Non.

Nonna: THANK GOD YOU ALIVE.

Me: What?

Nonna: I worry all night. I thought you were dead.

Me: Seriously?

Nonna: I cry all night.

Me: Oh my gosh.

Nonna: One day when you a grandmother you gonna no…I cry and say I hope my grandchildren no do drugs or drink or die.

Me: Wow.

Nonna: You have no idea what I think about you.

Me: I am going to get you a sedative.

Nonna: Good idea. Maybe I sleep. Eff you.

Me: Ah, back to normal.

Nonna: You need food?

Me: No. You packed me enough for a week.

Nonna: You wan me to come over?

Me: NO.

Nonna: disgatziata…

Me: You are nuts.

Nonna: You are bitch number one.

Me: BYE.

Today when I came back Nonna tried to convince me not to go to NY this weekend as planned…she says all this run around is gonna kill me.  I told her I wasn’t done being on a break from her.

Her response: When I die…then we be on a break.

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