Day 27: Joke Time

So the following is a joke told to me by Nonna:

Nonna:  There was this little boy who playin with the train.  The train go roun and roun and the little boy say “all aboard, all aboard, all the f*in people come aboard.”  The mother she hear these things and she come over and say “young man, you no supposed to say these things..you no play with the train for two hour.” So two hour later the boy say “mom can I play” the mom she say, yes but you no say these bad words or the train go in the garbage.  So they boy say: h-ok. And he start to play with the train again.  And roun and roun the train go and the boy say…”all aboard, all aboard, all the f*in people come aboard. If you wanna know about the two hour delay…blame-a the bitch in the kitchen.”

In other news…

Nonna drank a cup of espresso this morning…in addition to two cups of coffee.  Which means…she was out of her fricken mind.  When nonna drinks coffee she has a need to complete outrageous tasks.  For example: last week, she drank espresso and moved a full STOVE from our garage, up a flight of stairs, down another flight of stairs and into the basement.  What. So today, she decided to paint the bathroom a completely different color, move a washer and a dryer in the garage – LITERALLY MOVE, clean the new stove and garden.  All before 10am.

In further news…

My boyfriend is visiting.  Nonna told me before he came over that she “gonna steal him from me…because I am the number one woman.”

What. a. tramp.

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